Love can hurt hard, especially when the one you want is out the door. But if you weren't so busy feeling sorry for yourself, you could get busy winning back your ex. But how?
There are some basic rules, of course. Practice patience, don't act needy, maintain your dignity, keep up with your own life and your personal appearance, and just try to be the awesome person your ex fell in love with in the first place. Often, just moving forward with your own life happily is enough to make your ex think again about letting you go.
That said, timing is everything. And if you really want to maximize your chances of winning back a lost love, get Astrology on your side. Some dates and times are simply better than others for approaching an ex in hope of a happy ending.
Two of the best times for winning back a lost love are when Mercury, the planet of communication, or Venus, the planet of love, are in retrograde. When these planets appear to spin backward, people get more introspective and thoughtful about relationships and people and ideas from the past are more likely to resurface. That means your ex is more likely to be thinking about YOU, too.
Mercury goes retrograde three or four times each year, and Venus goes retrograde every 18 months. When Mercury is retrograde, it's not the best time to start a new relationship, but you are more likely to find your exes looking back. They'll be wondering if they made the right decision breaking up with you, and depending on how you behave (no whining or stalking or begging or crying), they may realize they made the wrong move.
And when Venus is retrograde -- happening right now in Leo, from July 25 - September 6, 2015, it's an even more powerful time for past loves to come calling. This is the time to play it cool and let your ex come to you -- don't worry, if it's meant to be they will. Venus Retrograde is a potent time for lost love to re-emerge, and when it does, just focus on being your happy, confident self and see how your relationship redevelops.
Keep your eye on Venus
Venus is not just a love power tool when retrograde, but also when the Sun is transiting through the signs Venus rules -- Taurus and Libra. This happens every year in April/May and September/October, making these months a good time to reach out to an ex (and by "reach out," no, we don't mean "stalk" or leave pictures of kittens and rainbows on their Facebook page).
Look to an astrological calendar to find out the exact dates the Sun will transit Taurus and Libra, signs of stability and relationships, then prep to make your move. Send a casual note during this time suggesting you meet up for a coffee or cocktail. Then show up looking your best and on top of the world. Present the outward picture of confidence and vitality, and your ex will be more open to seeing exactly what they're missing.
Watch the Moon
The Moon, which rules emotions, moves quickly. It transits through each sign for about 2.5 days, bringing an ever-changing flow of new emotional energy. Watch for the Moon to pass through loving signs like Taurus or Libra, or passionate Scorpio if you want to use sex as a weapon. Avoid approaching an ex when the Moon is in signs that are all business, like Capricorn or Virgo.
Also keep your eye out as the Moon waxes and wanes -- when it waxes, you'll have better luck with love. And wait about 12 hours past the New Moon to make any big moves, as it's more about new beginnings than resurrecting past love.
Aspects of love
"Aspects" are the angles planets make to each other, and if you watch the aspects carefully, you'll gain insight on when you'll have better luck in love. When the Sun, Moon or planets are forming "squares", you'll want to lay low. But when they are forming "trine" aspects, love gets a green light.
You'll want to consult your birth chart for more insight on when to act, react, or wait patiently for your ex to realize they've made a big ol' bad mistake. Don't worry, they will. You're awesome.